Novell's restaurant, Polehill Garden Centre
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| Novell's Restaurant, Polhill, Ploughmans |
Location -
Novell's restaurant
Polehill Garden Centre
London Road (A224)
Badgers Mount
Sevenoaks
Kent
TN14 7AD
Date of Visit - 22/06/2024
The Food
Novell's Ploughman's Lunch
6 -Pickled Onion.
Some tiny pickled onions lurked in a little pot, with some tiny little gherkins. They were OK, but just that. OK.
10 -Pickle.
It's not Ploughman's pickle, but it's no problem. It was a caramelised red onion chutney and entirely delicious and appropriate.
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| Pickled onions, Gherkins and Coleslaw |
.
9 -Cheese / Ham.
Cheese.
Cheddar. - It was OK. A tad on the mild side, I prefer my cheddar to have more West Country oomph about it, this just seemed like a bit of OK mousetrap. A bit small too, but you should know by now I'm cheese greedy, probably a perfectly sensible size for most people.
Brie. - Delicious. Good. Creamy and soft with a very light rind.
The Not Cheese.
This is often represented by ham, but today was a sausage roll. Bravo to this, I would have this any day. Soft on the inside and moist, not fatty. Good meatiness and fennel seeds give a nice twist of flavour. Pastry delightful. Solid and satisfying without being too much. Rescued the cheese and ham score here!
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| Champion sausage roll, is delicious. |
Minus 2!!! -Bread.
This was a WTF moment.
I do not know what travesty had befallen this bread, but if it were thiner would have made reasonable knicker elastic. I think it might have spent 5 minutes in a microwave, it should not be possible to mess up par-baked baguettes, but this was achieved.
3 -Spread
Butter. Standard packets. whatever...... Still, it was butter and it wasn't frozen solid.
3 -Presentation
The presentation was OK, nothing wrong with it, but nothing that made me go "I'm going to enjoy this", and isn't that the point about eating out?
3 -Salad, etc.
Nothing particularly wrong with it, and it would have been sorely missed. However, well, just look at it. a few lettuce leaves, a few slices of cucumber (that looked like they might have been hanging about a bit) and a mangled cherry tom. No dressing (not that it is necessary).
3 -Originality.
The Coleslaw was lovely. I presume made on the premises fresh as it was creamy, tasty and crunchy. A bit more would have been lovely, as it was such a treat.
Food Total: 36
Beverages
5 - Drinks.
Tea. The Tea was OK, but the teapot was not tested for its primary function of delivering a delightful infusion to the cup. The teapot's main function was one of table irrigation and user irritation.
Politicians should wake up to the national crisis and bring forth legislation making such travesties illegal. It's just not right.
Drinks Total: 5
The venue
7 - Service
The service was good.
The staff were very helpful and all was rather excellent. Food and drink were delivered promptly and efficiently and was made to feel welcome.
However, ordering the food was a bit of a trial. Three options: App, Terminal or a person.
There was no mobile signal nor obvious WiFi, so I looked for a person, and the person had a queue of customer-persons waiting upon their services to take the order (presumably due to the technological issues highlighted above). So I opted for the terminal. This was OK once I had worked out the illogical quirk of the interface. The terminal was actually quite good, but it took a while of me prodding and poking it when I wish a person had done it.
8 - Atmosphere
Considering it's a garden centre, and you are sat inside something similar to an industrial unit, the atmosphere is rather nice. The outlook is nice gardens and seating area.
3 - Location.
Nowhere in particular, just next to the A224 in a remarkably plain area of countryside. It might, however, make a nice break if you are on the M25, as it's only 5 minutes from Junction 4 of the M25 (between the M20 & M22).
4 - Toilets.
Standard, good.
Venue total: 22
Score: 63
Editors note.
As hinted at above - a great place to stop if on a longer journey. If only a tiny percentage of people diverted from the motorway services to local facilities so many pubs, village shops and garages would not only be saved but reopened.
The score seems very low, however, it's because you really shouldn't treat bread like that. As a note, I have eaten there before and it was great, and all the other dishes that came out were tip-top. Also, sort your bloody teapots out, there is no need for a pouring failure. Overall, I would rate the place as worth a visit for food - so do not let my ploughman's review put you off.
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